Catfish Christmas
As most of you probably know, the great Tony Todd passed away in November
2024. In honor of Mr. Todd, I paid homage to his Candyman action figure on my
YouTube channel, where I talk about toys. However, while perusing his IMDB
page, I saw that Mr. Todd appeared in another one of my passions—silly holiday
romantic movies. So obviously, we had to stop what we were doing, track down
this movie "Catfish Christmas" (which is playing for free on Tubi at
the moment), and further pay homage to the late, great Tony Todd. While the man
might not want this particular film to be his everlasting legacy, I'll tell you
what I know about Tony Todd: this brother never half-assed any role, including
this one.
It is a great day for the lovely Leslie (Leigh Ann Rose) as her fiancé Xavier
has just proposed to her. Hate to get sidetracked again, but I KNOW the actor
playing Xavier! That would be my main man, my homeboy from Detroit, Yancy
Fuqua. Without getting too much into it, we were in a movie together almost 20
years ago. I'm not an actor—I was kind of the director. Kind of. Anyway, when
Xavier told his old dude about his wedding proposal, his father said he didn't
want any gold diggers in his family and that if Xavier doesn't cut her off,
he's cutting him off. I guess having an aversion to being poor, Xavier quickly
and suddenly ends this engagement.
Some time has passed since that sad day and it is Christmas, with Leslie
heading back home for the holidays. She is greeted by Mom (the legendary Ella
Joyce) and Dad (Tony Todd), who both ask in unison if she's met anybody yet.
Leslie lets them know that she doesn't need no man to complete her! Oh, you
silly girl. Do you know what kind of movie you're in right now? Then we meet
Leslie's adorable pregnant little sister Faith (Charlotte Evelyn Williams). As
we will see, this kid is going to be a problem. Also making the trip to see
Leslie is Devin (Devin Laster), the goofy kid from high school who has always
had a thing for Leslie. But with Leslie being a high-powered corporate
accountant and Devin being a bartender who lives down the street in a house
with two other dudes as roommates, that's probably not gonna happen for my man.
HAHAHA!!!! It's totally gonna happen for my man.
Still, the order of the day is to find Leslie a man. Then a commercial comes
on featuring local football star Mike Avery (Anthony Riggins Jr.), and
considering Mike Avery looks like Terrence Howard and Billy Dee Williams got
together and had a baby, Leslie mentions, off the cuff, that this is an
ultra-handsome man she would not mind dating.
Hmmm... So what if, say, Mike Avery was to contact Leslie through a dating
app and say nice things to her? This would be Faith, Leslie's sister's bright
idea. Faith's husband tells her that catfishing her sister is a terrible idea
and nothing good can come of it, but truly, how bad can it go?
So Faith gets to the business of catfishing her sister, pretending to be
Mike Avery, and Leslie is amazed at how kind and funny he is, and how it seems
like he's known her his whole life—because he has. Eventually, of course,
Leslie wants to meet the handsome football star. Oh Faith, what are we going to
do?
Would you believe that there is a charity "Date Mike Avery"
auction going on? So adorable little sis empties the savings account to buy her
sister a date with a guy she thinks she's kind of already dating. Again, what
could possibly go wrong with any of this? And if you have observed, we haven't
mentioned Devin much. That would be because Devin isn't in this movie a lot. I
mean, he peeks through the blinds and gives Leslie unwanted phone calls here
and there, but his options are looking great for achieving a love match here.
Even though it's still going to happen.
So Leslie and Mike Avery go on a date. We use Mike Avery's full name because
Mike Avery uses Mike Avery's full name when addressing himself. He's that guy.
The date seemed to go really well, with Mike Avery being told by baby sister to
pretend like this is the first time they met—since this is the first time they
met—but after a second date, there are cracks in Mike Avery's armor. Like he's
a super famous football star, and people in public constantly ask him for his
autograph and selfies. Leslie hates that! But Mike Avery does seem to really
like her, however.
But at least Devin is always there to lend a comforting ear, to the point
that Leslie is starting to see Devin in a different light. I mean, not much
about Devin has changed that I can see, but we got to get to point B somehow.
Eventually, of course, Leslie will learn about the catfishing. I can't
remember how—something to do with the kids playing around somebody's phone they
had no business touching—and she absolutely loses it! As well, she should have.
Little sister is now on her list! And so is Mike Avery, even though he had
nothing to do with this and just wants to get to know Leslie better. That
doesn't stop him from getting dumped. Oh wait, you can't dump Mike Avery, but
Mike Avery can dump you! This leads to Leslie drowning her sorrows at the bar
Devin works at, the two having a deep heart-to-heart setting up a near-miss
kiss, but later sealing that kiss on Christmas Day at the top of the stairs,
like forever. I mean that was a pretty long holiday romantic movie kiss. The
scene shockingly switches to an exhausted couple in bed after what we can only
assume was some spirited lovin'. No, not Leslie and Devin, but Tony Todd and
freaking Ella Joyce. Hey, I love both of those actors, but I don't think
anybody wanted to see that Victoria! I'm talking to the absolutely lovely
Victoria Rowell, the director of nonsense.
A year later, at Christmas, everything is fine. The sisters love each other
again, the pregnant sister’s baby is born, and Devin proposes. And since Devin
is broke, there is no rich dad to subvert the love... at Christmas.
Okay... so this movie is nuts, but it is kind of entertaining. Even though
I'm not quite sure that director Victoria knows exactly how these movies are
supposed to work, but I'm going to help her out a bit for the next one she does,
because I’m a self-appointed expert in this field. No disrespect to Devin, but
Mike Avery should've been the male lead, mainly because dude is so
good-looking, but they should've shown a picture of him back in high school
looking like a Poindexter. Also, while it is fine that Devin works at the bar,
but little does she know he also owns that bar and a chain of bars across the
northeast basin. That’s what should’ve
happened. And he’s totally rich. Also, Xavier, the first fiancé, should've come
back at some point to further complicate things. Also, I'm sure somebody in
this cast has to know how to sing, so I don't know why my director couldn't
squeeze in some Christmas carols. At least we did get Christmas tree
decorating, lots of cookie baking, some cute if not badass kids running around,
and wise old people dispensing wisdom when they weren't having sex. No snow
fights or snowmen, though. Again, hard to pull off when you shoot these movies
in August.
While the movie didn't look like a high-dollar production, it still provided
some of the best acting you're going to see in a movie of this type. Not just
Mr. Todd and Miss Joyce, who were fabulous of course, but pretty much the
entire cast, especially Charlotte Evelyn Williams as the troublesome baby
sister. She's kind of the villain in this, but she's so cute and adorable that
it's hard to hate on her.
So if you're in the mood for something completely, absolutely, and totally
ridiculous but still kind of fun to sit through, "Catfish Christmas"
just might satisfy that fix. Rest in eternal power, Tony Todd.
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